In October 2021, I was in the best shape ever. Not traveling during pandemic, meant that I ate home cooking, and had plenty of time for the gym. One of the many things I realized after March 13, 2020 (the day we went completely virtual) was that the coming and going of traveling for work had fatigued my body to the point of exhaustion. I was tired and didn’t even know it. Later into 2020, I realized that the coming and going also meant that I did not do things because I was in this don’t start something that you cannot finish mode. This mode affected eating well and exercise too.
By the time I hit 2021 I was in great shape, in the gym regularly - emphasis on regularity - I lost 10 pounds, and felt amazing. I’m not in a place yet to speak about hubster’s health issues but let’s just say that we were sucker punched in mid-2021 with health news that left me ship wrecked. I vacillated between feeling like I was on solid ground and struggling in quick sand….and this is where the irregularity of workouts began. I maintained fairly well until October 2021 and then I crashed big time - just hit a concrete wall and could not motivate myself to get in the gym. Sigh.
I wish I could say this was a one time occurrence - but as I reflect, this sort of go strong and then hit a wall is a repeating pattern. I offer this not to induce a woe is her sort of feeling but to acknowledge what I suspect is something that others experience too. I get it. Going strong and then bam. Life happens. What I don’t understand about myself is that if you give me a project I’m full throttle until the “vision” is made into fruition. But when it comes to my own self care, I can derail, experience setbacks, etc. It’s what I realized here lately is a sort of self destructive pattern that isn’t good for me. My spiritual and intellectual life is so intertwined with my physical being….the gym being where I talk to God and experience solace.
So 2022, I set my intention toward getting back in shape and trying to figure out this pattern and the ways it influences my life. Today is the first day - I don’t know that I have the self care or discipline to post every day but here we go. If you struggle with self care - please drop me a line. I’m learning as I go.
Blessings,
Alicia
Image Source: https://unsplash.com/@helloimnik